Here’s What a Sustainable Relationship with Your Home Looks LIke

One of my favorite teachers, Gay Hendricks, says that we live our life in one of four zones:

  • The Zone of Incompetence: I believe this is the uncomfortable place we ALL start, every time we begin to master a new skill. The temptation is to get STUCK, depressed, and stay in this zone.
  • The Zone of Competence: for me, it’s such a relief to get to this zone. A feeling of mastery grows as we realize we can do it well—most of the time!
  • The Zone of Excellence: In this zone we can even teach others how to do it, and we feel even more positive about our life.
  • The Zone of Genius: Now we’ve developed personal power—and we enjoy offering our own unique methods and programs to support others!

As I pondered Gay Hendricks ideas, and remembered moving up the Zones in my life, I realized that the homes in which I’ve lived and worked in have literally partnered with me to move me forward.  How?  Because I’ve consciously partnered, in sustainable ways, with THEM!

Here’s how you can create the same kind of conscious, sustainable relationship with your home:

  1. To move up from the Zone of Incompetence, make changes in your home that allow you to feel more PEACEFUL
  2. To move up from the Zone of Competence, make changes in your home that allow you to feel more POSITIVE
  3. To move up from the Zone of Excellence, make changes in your home that allow you to feel more personally POWERFUL


TO MOVE UP —> allow your home to help you feel more PEACEFUL!

tableWhen we start mastering something new, the Zone of Incompetence is a pretty uncomfortable place to be!  And when we are frustrated and short-tempered, it can be harder to make progress and move up into the Zone of Competence.

So, when I find myself in the Zone of Incompetence, I know cultivating inner peace will give me the compassion to forgive my mistakes and keep going.

To cultivate PEACE, find something to organize.  Usually, when I’m in the Zone of Incompetence, it’s not hard to find a messy surface!   And when I’ve spent an hour de-cluttering, my mind is more spacious and open to creativity and new ideas.

If you keep going with your de-cluttering projects, you are going to end up with a high-functioning home and workspace—which will give you that sense of inner peace!

Because when we’ve created order in our homes and workspaces, we consistently experience the calm, centered, congruent feelings that accompanies inner peace.  When our home and workspace embodies peace, we do, too. And when we embody peace, we more gracefully move up to the Zone of Competence.


TO MOVE UP —> allow your home to help you feel more POSITIVE!

home-officeAfter the clutter is gone, it is important to focus your attention on your big vision, your long term goals.  How?

Remove everything from your space that does not relate to or support that big vision.  Display reminders of your goals.  This is where Feng Shui can really help activate your intentions!

Cultivate a POSITIVE vision by creating an altar that activates your goals.  An altar is any item or grouping of items that alters—in a positive way—your mood and energy level.  It’s impossible not to be up-lifted when we are surrounded by images that anchor our intentions!


TO MOVE UP —> allow your home to help you feel more PERSONALLY POWERFUL!

excellenceHow can we allow our Genius to deliberately create a bigger vision for our lives, and for our work in the world?  Allow your home to help you embody your PERSONAL POWER!  Personal power is not power over others. It’s personal mastery of your time, space, money, attention, energy.

To cultivate PERSONAL POWER, put yourself in the “command position” and surround yourself with ONLY those colors, textures, furnishings, accessories and symbols that make you feel powerful.  In the command position, your back is against a solid wall and you can easily see who is coming in the door.


TO STAY THERE: Celebrate — and Focus on Serving Others!

microphone_audience1When you get to this level, your focus will be on serving others in a bigger way. And, don’t be surprised if living in your Zone of Genius gets you started learning something new… and you find yourself back in the Zone of Incompetence.

Just look around for something to organize and the resulting inner peace will propel you up to the next zone!

This process really does work.  Back when my home was a mess, so was I.  I wasn’t able to manage my time or energy well.  I was depressed and unhappy.  But as I went through the process of getting rid of the clutter and creating sustainable systems, I changed.  I began to correspond to those changes, becoming first more peaceful, then more positive, then more empowered.

I would love to hear from those of you who are also experiencing the benefits of creating sustainable relationships with their homes!  Share you comments with us below.

Judgement and Desire Cannot Live In The Same Space

April_post2What is your relationship with what you desire?  Are you in a state of joyful expectancy and fulfillment?

If you’re not enjoying your desires, it’s usually because you have some kind of judgement on them. 

Here are some of the judgements I’m familiar with:

• It’s not OK for me to want that.

• That’s too expensive.

• I’ll never be able to…..

• It’ll take me forever to get that done!

• I don’t deserve it.

If any of these judgments come up for you when you ponder your desires, you need to become more like a little child.  A baby doesn’t spin into mental judgments when she wants something.  She just wants it!  She allows herself to have the feeling of DESIRE! 

Have you ever watched a baby determined to master a new skill?  Maybe she wanted to sit, to crawl, to walk, or to pull herself up to the window so she can look out at the world. 

Her DESIRE is the very energy that fueled her action!

In how many ways can you be more like that baby?  If you want a de-cluttered, organized home, are you willing to keep trying, to keep falling down and getting back up again?  Are you willing to ask for any support you need so that you can master the new skills that will give you your goal?

What’s Your Unique Retrival Strategy?

We each have a Learning Strategy, how we best learn information. Take a look at the different types of learning strategies below and see what best fits how you learn.

Learning Strategies

  • If we are visual: we need to see the information we’re trying to learn
  • If we are auditory: we learn best by hearing the information we’re trying to learn
  • If we are kinesthetic: we learn best when we are moving our body in a way that helps us learn

My Learning Strategy is visual, which made school very easy for me. Our US school system is set up for visual and auditory learners. I don’t have a photographic memory, but all I had to do was read the information a few times and I knew it.

What about you? What is your Learning Strategy?


  • Were you the kid who had a photographic memory, or, like me, could you read the information a few times and have a good feel for it?
  • When you have to memorize a script, do you read it silently several times and just have it?


  • Or did you learn best at school when you could hear the information repeated a few times?
  • If you are an auditory learner and you have to memorize a script, you’ll need to read it aloud and hear yourself saying it over and over in order to memorize it.


  • Or were you like my son Logan, who didn’t really “get” anything until his body was moving? The alphabet was hieroglyphics to him until he could trace sandpaper letters and FEEL it in his body!

If you are a kinesthetic learner, you will need to involve your body in your learning experience. If you have to memorize a script, it will be easiest if you type it out and then practice it with movements/choreography.


I believe we each have a Unique Retrieval Strategy, how we best remember where we have stored something. When we are trying to remember where we’ve put something,

If we are visual: we “see” the item in our minds eye

If we are auditory: we “hear” what was said (by us or others) when we stored the item. It’s also possible to “hear” the music you were playing at the time.

If we are kinesthetic: we have a body-sense of the physical position our body was in when we stored it (reaching up onto the shelf, kneeling and opening the bottom file drawer, etc.)

Tell us in the comments below what your unique retrival strategy is.  How do you remember things?  You can also join the conversation on our Transforming Space Transforming Self Facebook Page.

Would you like a Clean Sweep in your life?

Some professional organizers believe that if they can help you put everything “away,” they are doing a good job. But… “A place for everything and everything in it’s place” doesn’t make much sense if the items you’re putting away don’t really need to be kept, don’t really serve your future success.

A great professional organizer helps you to understand that organizing is about setting up your environment for success. Your success. Success with the goals you are working toward in your life right now.

A great professional organizer will help you define what function you want each room in your home to serve for you. And then, a great professional organizer will help you create an empowering, sustainable relationship with your each of those spaces, a relationship that will serve your success.

  • Empowering, because when you’ve organized your rooms in a way that sets them up to function optimally for you, a way that helps you achieve your goals, you are empowered to BE and DO more!
  • Sustainable, because when we organize your rooms, using Sustainable Systems that align with your goals and your Unique Retrieval Strategy (how your brain remembers where you’ve put something), it’s EASY to maintain the order, and your sanity and vitality!

Your Home and Workspace are Your Success Partners
From my perspective, a great professional organizer needs to help you set up your environment to function as your Success Partner.

What is a Success Partner? You may not have heard the term before, but I’ll bet you can sense what a Success Partner is: someone who supports your goals, someone who brings all their gifts, skills, and abilities to the relationship—in an honest, transparent, vulnerable, willing-to-share way.

We’ve all had family members, teachers, bosses, or colleagues who’ve partnered with us and helped us achieve success. We wouldn’t be where we are in life today without the mentoring and support our Success Partners gave us.

The rooms we live and work in are partnering with us, whether we know it or not. Your space is alive and intelligent, whether you connect with it at this level or not. Your home is always offering you its gifts:

  • shelter
  • safety
  • structure
  • pattern
  • light
  • storage for stuff we need and want
  • horizontal spaces for rest, work and play
  • the possibility for pattern, textures, colors and furnishings that please us
  • a template within which we can create success

What if you believed that your home and workspace wanted to be your Success Partner? What if you considered that your rooms long to support your goals, to function optimally to serve your success?

Your environment is successful ONLY IF it is set up to serve YOUR success! Over the years, I’ve worked with many wonderful business and life coaches. They all say the same thing: if you want to create success in your business and your life, you have to get your environment functioning optimally and feeling wonderful.

How do I set up my Home and Workspace as Success Partners?
The best way I’ve found is to start with a Clean Sweep. Not the kind of Clean Sweep you might see on TV shows where everything in the house is hauled outside, and only some of it is put back by organizers, who create lovely systems that may or may not work for the family they are organizing. Many of those people end up having the clutter creep back into their lives because they don’t know how to create Sustainable Systems that align with their own Unique Retrieval Strategy.

The kind of Clean Sweep that can jump start a successful de-cluttering and re-organizing process has several components:

  • emotional: to clear the emotional reasons for the clutter
  • mental: to clear any limiting beliefs about being able to organize
  • physical: to learn strategies for the actual process of editing and organizing
  • spiritual: to relate to your space in empowering, sustainable ways

This kind of inner and outer Clean Sweep will help you

  • release any clutter
  • re-organize your home
  • rejuvenate your life

Because we’re coming out of winter and into spring, and I want each of you to be able to harness that “spring cleaning” energy, I’m offering a FREE training for you on Sunday March 9th (and YES, you can forward this email and invite your friends!) Click the image below to register.

I hope to see you there!

Find Out How to Get the Support You Need to Get it Done!

Have you ever wondered how easy it could be to get your home de-cluttered, organized, Feng Shui-ed?

If you would benefit from the emotional and energetic support of an expert working one-on-one with you, please click here for more details on my private work with clients.

If it feels like it might be a fit to work together, please email me with the answers to the questions at the bottom of the form.